Tuesday, June 3, 2008

That Reigstry

Editors note: How annoying is it going to get with me putting the word "That" in front of everything? A little? Are you unsubscribing right this very second?

Recently we, as a couple, switched over into this new realm of acceptance. I still do not have a ring, but I am no longer the only person in this relationship telling people that we will be getting married in October. It's a pretty big deal. This means, that on top of all of the other fun wedding tasks I have been tackling, I have finally started participating in every couples favorite activity second favorite activity after cake tasting, creating a registry.

I think that the whole "gift" thing is considered taboo to talk about, but come on? Who doesn't give a gift when they got to a wedding? It is expected that I will feed you and provide you with a nice time, and it is expected that you will give me something in return to wish me a happy and prosperous beginning. Let's just drop all the pretenses and admit that we all know that this is the case. Emily Post were you reading that last paragraph? I said it, I expect to get gifts from my guests. Please note the subtle wording of that sentence, the words to get inserted before the word gift really effect the meaning and I don't want you to read that and misunderstand. I don't absolutely expect gifts from my guests, as I think they are a kind and meaningful gesture (not a rite), but as tradition currently stands I expect that guest will be giving them to me. Thus the reason I create a registry.

I thought I would get some resistance from my Mom for this idea, but she is apparently right on board, which I think is great.

We have decided (and by we I mean I brought up the idea and he gave his usual, "you can do whatever you want" response) not to register in any physical stores.

The first reason for this is that ordering off the internet will hopefully encourage guests to ship packages rather than give them to us in person and expect us to find a way to pay to ship them to Texas.

(Hello to any of my future guests! Were you reading that last sentence because I really really mean it.)

The other reason behind this decision is the huge variety or products we will be able to choose from. I can shop at MOMA, Uncommon Goods, Anthropologie, and my favorite little store ever MXYPLYZYK (yes that is really the name, bookmark it now if you like it because you will never be able to google it later)

Now I have to begin finding the right website to use to create my registry.

Options include:

I created a "birthday registry" for my birthday this year with wishpot, and I really liked it. They have a firefox plugin that allows me to easily add items while browsing, and a nifty little feature that allows the purchaser to hide the purchase of the time from the list creator. This is important for potential registry stalkers like myself. I will probably end up going with myregistry.com if it is just as user friendly because it looks a little more "weddingy" to me.

Does anyone have any experience with any of these sites, or with others? Any registry must-haves? Anyone going the same route that I am?

(Note that we are considering creating a junk Bed Bath and Beyond list, so if people absolutely have to go somewhere, we can just have my Mom take everything back after the wedding)


Guilty Secret said...

This one needs a list :)

1. I love how you call everything "that" something. It's cute :)

2. Loved your paragraph on getting gifts.

3. Apparently it's pronounced Mixeeplizik (inspired by a character in early Superman comics). That might make it easier to remember?!

4. We have been living in sin for over four years, so we have everything we need. We could still register and effectively upgrade all our belongings, but we'd like to be able to afford to own our own flat some time this century, so we're asking for cash instead. Take "that," Emily Post!

Kelli said...

Registering sounds like so much fun!! Remember when we were at Bed Bath and Beyond with Tyler getting Emily's wedding present, um, 2 or 3 years ago, and Tyler and I liked to think about when we'd be registering and how much fun it would be. Lol. Weird.

Jenna said...

guilty-Is Mixeeplizik really that easy to remember? LOL. I think more and more couples have been living together long enough that the "rules" need to be re-evaluated to take that into consideration.

kelli-haha, I totally forgot about that. That Groom is the only guy I have dated seriously enough to consider having any registry conversations with.

Linda said...

I'm using thingsiwant for our registry. It's pretty easy to use and I like it. But a lot of my guests have been confused by it. Some people don't check off things they purchased. And the site can be unreliable ie it's down a lot.

The Clarkes said...

DEFINITELY register at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. EVERYONE goes there and their returns are sooo easy and they will even give you cash back for gifts you received. A lot of older people (i.e. your parent's friends who are giving you gifts) will go there no matter what and they won't understand the whole internet thing. haha. But if you register there, you can return it and get cash or credit and then re-buy it when you get to Texas. Also, they won't tell you that you can get cash but you can so you have to ask. If you have questions or want to talk about it more you can email me! Good luck!

Blue Eyed Bride said...

the good them with bed bath and beyond is that they give cash if you want it after returning something.

i did neiman marcus, williams-sonoma, dillards, a local gift shop, and bed bath and beyond because i was trying to make it easy on my guests. only a handful of people used the online versions of registries for us. we got tons of gifts at showers and at the wedding, but we also got a lot in the mail.i tried the myregistry.com, but found that people weren't using it. we also didn't advertise anywhere, though.

we got most of our gifts from williams-sonoma, neiman marcus, and dillards. bed bath and beyond wasn't the most popular, but it's a good nation-wide standby for people. a good department store is good, too. bed bath and beyond has begun to carry find china and that really makes it a one-stop-registry-shop. and i'm not even a fan of bed bath and beyond-- they're just really accommodating to brides and grooms.

style-ish said...

I like the "That" in front of everything.

I'm all for consistency... it keeps me coming back. :)

Kate said...

I was wondering what people would say about the "That" since I use "The" quite often. Glad to hear it's gotten a good response - I enjoy it as well.

As for the registries, there are rumors of bankruptcy - so just stay away from Linens 'n Things.

I'm considering using an online registry - I've been using Kaboodle for over a year now for birthdays and holidays and I love it! So, give me a little time of researching and I'll post about my opinions on online Wedding Registries later. ;)

Jenna said...

Linda-Sounds like I won't be using thingsIwant. If I am going to rely on a website for my entire registry, I need to make sure it is reliable.

alison-I am really happy about the cash instead of store credit thing. I'll be bugging them about cash when we take them back.

erin-I think the stores that people use depend on their region. We don't even have Neiman Marcus or Williams and Sonoma readily available. I'm not a fan of BBB either, but it looks like the way to go.

styleish-I hope I can keep things consistently good.

Kate-I hadn't heard of kaboodle. Guess I need to add it to the list. can't wait to see what you come up with.

Anonymous said...

Hi Jenna! First, congratulations on getting married! I hope you won't mind me speaking up - but I work with MyRegistry.com, and I came across your blog. And as you can probably guess, we're eager to have you post your gift-list with us! Not only can you list anything you want - from anyplace you can think of - you can also start a cash gift fund, which means you can tastefully invite friends and family to give you cash instead of gifts! (Saves you the trouble of returning everything to Bed,Bath and Beyond!)We are definitely reliable, and yes, people actually do use us-a lot! Good luck with all the wedding planning, and please let me know if I can help in anyway!

i could be your cousin too said...

Hey Jenna- Loved your post! So we created our wedding registry with wishpot- despite the less than weddingy feel. It was the most user friendly and we could add items from anywhere. And I am so glad we did cause we got almost everything off our registry. And in the end that is what counted! Anyway Congrats and bah to the living in sin thing.... ;)

Jenna said...

slazerlee-the personal attention is very tempting... Thanks for the comment!

icouldbeyourcousin-Another vote for wishpot.